Why choose a reliquary?
The portable memorial
" I wanted Dad to be with me during my exams, I knew he would have been so proud."
" Auntie had us falling off our seats at every match, it helped bring back so many great memories, bless her! "
A reflection
from Tim
For a long time, I have been attracted to graveyards. As a meditator they often provide a quiet and private space to sit and contemplate life and all its challenges. During my monastic years in England, I would normally bring whatever food I received on alms round to a churchyard to eat peacefully and respectfully in silence, without being disturbed by anybody.
It was these times when the few newly finished graves with shining headstones and fresh flowers stood out boldly in front of row upon row of many leaning stones and memorials, broken and often illegible. I would ask myself how much love and attention these magnificent and extravagant structures received before years of neglect and decay.
Many relatives were also probably no longer around, perhaps the entire family of generations had now moved away from the village. These churches used to serve a much more permanent community, these days families rarely stay in the same place for very long periods as they follow changing careers and opportunities.
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I recall a friend in Thailand who kept two little reliquaries containing some remains of her parents with her wherever she lived. They were placed along side other religious items on a shrine which she cared for beautifully and joyfully under a balcony roof of her home.
It was at that time I thought that a portable memorial would serve people well in these days of constant change and uncertainty.
For my part I rarely visit my fathers grave these days, and it is only a few minutes’ walk from where I am living now. I can’t honestly say that I have any sense that he is anyway close to that place. I remember his dead body was not something I wanted to hold on to since he had already left it behind for us to dispose of. It was not a lovely thing at all. The graveyard is a sad and lonely place. The closest thing I can touch that brings my father, his love, his sense of humour and his brilliance back to my heart is a penknife.
I have been making small earns for people for some time. They bring a powerful connection, a focus point, a place to aim all the love, gratitude, and honour towards. We have ceremonies, anniversaries, and special times to reflect and heal. It hard to describe what the reliquary does to lift the spirit. For many years they have carried the holy remains of saints. I think many people have saints of their own who deserve raising up and glorifying!
Not only for ashes
A lock of hair, a special ring or jewel, or even a secret stash beautifully concealed
